Happy Valentines Day!
It's the sixth week of Winter Quarter. I have four more weeks until finals. I'm graduating a quarter early. I am planning on going on Project Reclaim for spring break...if I had a spring break. Still need to raise support for that. Besides that, what is next?
I've started looking at jobs. I've applied for four internships, one of which is already full. I've been too lazy to write cover letters to apply to more. Why? Because...I don't have a real interest in them or I don't have some of the skills or equipment they require. I'm also just not ready to be done with the student life. Not to mention, I only decided to graduate early over Winter Break. Not much time to figure out anything right?
I want to eventually work with Warner Bros. Animation...not as an animator. I'm terrible at drawing. However, I want to be involved in that industry somehow. I've applied for a couple internships there. The problem with working there starting April is that I am living in SB until June. Commuting there and back will be a lot of hours and gas. If the internship I get there ends up being not paid, I have no way of paying all that gas money without borrowing money from parents. I would also need to figure out how to pay for food. I'm more than likely going to have to find something local.
Yeah, I'm looking for a job to honor my parents and to be able to support myself since I'm no longer going to be supported by them. I've had thoughts about interning with Cru or with Epic, but something is stopping me from really pursuing those paths. If I want to intern with them, I would want to intern at SB. Stinting would be cool too. I heard that there is a need for interns in Tokyo. I guess with those paths, I fear what my parents think. Now, it wouldn't make sense to fear that they would stop supporting me financially since they are already doing that after I graduate. I guess I struggle with the thought of my parents being angry or disappointed with me. I may also fear that I can't raise enough support, especially since I am having trouble doing that for Spring Reclaim. I also wouldn't be able to go on Reclaim if I can't find a job because my parents refuse to send my passport to me until I get a job...Finally, there is also the question, "What if I want to intern/stint for selfish reasons?" How do I know my heart is in the right place for that?
Christina Marshall talked at Epic about surrendering things to God in order to grow. If I want to intern or stint, there is going to be a lot of things I need to surrender to God. I'd have to be able to give up what my parents think of me. I have to give up fear that I won't be provided financially. I have to know why I want to intern or stint. I may even have to surrender my own plans and goals. I would also have to give up going on Reclaim for Spring because I obviously won't be able to get my passport...unless God provides a way out and I am somehow able to get it. I still need to trust God with a lot.
I have thought a lot about what I am doing after I'm done with school. I just haven't done much to pursue anything. So much to think about...Pray that I can get all these figured out.
Until next time,
Kenneth
